If I ever let you go.

For the past me, my thought full of questions. Should I really let you go? and the now me. I'll say "It's time for you and me to go our separate ways". I'll always cherish of our days like there is no tomorrow. Your love was like the heavens from above. and it felt so real like a dream for me. I'll always keep you close here in my sleep. Even though it has been too long but you know, I'm always still holding on. Every time I see you, you make me wanna enchanted in your hand. but, I know. I couldn't. people may said, I'm a fighter. but, I'm not. I called myself. a betrayal. and I'm tired of it. how I wish you keep coming back to me. but, you never will. never did. you are more than a friend, dumb. I told my friends that I'll be okay. that things are over and I'm over it. It just keep getting better. They thinks that I'm just lying to myself. They don't even know that I am proving to myself. That I can be okay without you in my life. I'll do just fine like I know you'll be fine. I was born without you. and I shall live my life without you. I know, my heart want it. want you to be with me. I'll never gonna do so. how come, every time. I moved on. I will always be the same? There are things, I keep holding on. even though, I knew it will never be the same. When will I stop loving you?

I'm still loving you.

When I close my eyes think of you
And the time we’ve had been through
Even though were for apart right now

I remember back when you were here with me
How you’ve make my world complete
But now I’m left alone

We talked about love and hope
Wishing we could start a life our own
I wish that I could live without you

Why did you tear my heart apart
You said you’ll love me from the start
All those painful things you’ve put me through
But I’m still loving you
I’ve tried to give my best to you
I don’t deserve the things you do
Everything has gone to memories
I just wish I know the truth behind the lies

Mistake.

I'm still at this place. Still by your side, I'm tired of wandering. Today again I'm still spinning, flowing and flowing, day after day. That's how I'm here now. You knew of my hurting heart. I hurt when you smile.There is no excuse to laugh and pretend not to know. For not making you love me more, it's my mistake. For making myself love you more, it's my mistake. For not making you love me as much as I wanted you to, it's my mistake. How much more longer, must my tears fall? The lies telling me to wait even my deceived selfishness is now. Tired and worn. Knowing that I can't have you, my indulgent heart is still growing. After waiting alone all by myself, after regretting alone all by myself. It seem that loving you was also a mistake. For not knowing that I will never forget the pain. It's my mistake. I must look like such a fool, for knowing that I'll get hurt but not wanting to let go. Though everything is my fault even then, it's okay. As long as you are here always. Please forgive this kind of me, the me who loves you.

COMEBACK??

YOU WILL REGRET LATER LATER

My Story & My Cursed

you let me down, friend!